Can you smell the rain?

This doesn't happen as much in Oregon, but in Utah and Kansas where I grew up, you could smell the rain coming.  In the summer, when it was dry and hot and you got that whiff...it was so exciting to know it was about to downpour.  To cool things off, settle the dust.  A pouring rain in the hot summer months is a great thing for a child to play in.  I loved it!
It also meant change.  A small change maybe.  A brief change probably.  But a change.  And when you have had days and days of dry weather, a change can be good.
I can honestly say, that the past few years has been the least amount of change I have experienced in a long time.  We have been very stable.  We have lived in the same house, had the same number of children, the same jobs, the same cars.  I am not saying this to complain.  Believe me.  It has been nice to settle into some sort of routine. 
But I know life.  And I know how God works in my life.  Often, when I am feeling stable and settled is when He shakes things up a bit. 
I don't exactly know if that is happening in my life right now.  There are a couple of things my husband and I are praying about, some decisions we need to make.  I don't know where God is going to take us but, these decisions have gotten me thinking about my life.  My desires, things I want to accomplish, actions I want to take. 
There are a lot of things on those lists.  Too many things on those lists really.  As a working mom, as a mom, there is so much busyness.  There are so many things that we strive to achieve.  But realistically we cannot do it all.  We read blogs and wonder why we can't have it all together.  I wish I could be crafty and pull out amazing things for my kids to occupy their time, or grind my own flour and make my own bread, or take them to music lessons, swim lessons, the library....it goes on and on but it is impossible for me to do everything that I want to do. 
So instead of feeling like I am failing at doing lots of things, I need to sit down and figure out what few things I can do that are the right things.
This blog is one of those things.  I started it out as a way to journal some of my crazy thoughts as a working mom.  But I am not sure where it is going.  I am not even sure I have time to do it.  Is it something that is beneficial for me to continue?  And if I continue, what do I want my focus to be.  I have a friend who is an amazing blogger.  Her posts make me laugh and cry and stop and breathe.  She is amazing!  Truly, if you are looking for a new blog to read, check hers out.  But I am feeling super unfocused here and while I realize I will never be an amazing writer and I have no aspirations for this to become something huge, I need to know if it is truly something I should be doing.  
So, for those 2 of you who read this:-)  I would love your prayers and I will update as I get a few things sorted out. 

I went to Winco

I did.  On the second of the month.  I thought I was safe.  I avoided the first day of the month.  You know, the day people get their government money and go to Winco and buy cartloads of food.  I avoid it every month.  But I did go yesterday and that was a mistake.  It was busy and I got a baaaaddd attitude about it.  I realized that I need to avoid going on those days because of my attitude.  Not because of other people.
Generally, I understand that there are people out there who need assistance.  And I feel that to whom much is given, much is expected.  I grew up with a single mom who would have benefited from food stamps.  There were times where she was scrounging around the house for change to buy bread or milk to get us through the week.  We never went hungry but it was a stress for all of us.
So I understand that people struggle financially.  That people need help to put food on the table so their kids don't go hungry. 
What I struggle is when I see people who use government assistance because they don't have a job or can't work but when I see them using the assistance in an extravagant way.  Then I become judgemental.  This is where it is my problem.  What they do with the money God has provided for them should really be between them and God.  And I need to be a good steward of what God has given me.  And not to get bitter about what I have which honestly, sometimes seems less than what they have. 
But last night, God reminded me of how good I truly have it and that what I have is not even my own.
I just started reading Acts and what I read last night was "Now all who believed were together, and had all things in common, and sold their possessions and goods, and divided them among all, as anyone had need." Acts 2:44-45
As anyone had need....I have no idea what other people are going through when I see them in the store or in my clinic.  I don't know why they can't work or why they struggle, and I shouldn't really need to know.  God shows us His model of how we are supposed to behave.  How we are supposed to give.  He puts things on our hearts. 
God calls us to be generous.  He calls us to give back.  He calls us to have compassionate hearts and to pray for people. 
It's really easy to get caught up in money.  But it is such a trap and it is temporary.  What I have today could be gone in an instant.  That is not what will sustain me.
I am grateful that He puts this reminder on my heart.  That in obeying Him by reading the Word (something I really struggle with), my heart changed.  And helped me see areas of where I need to pray.

It's been awhile

I can't believe it has been almost a month since I last blogged.  Life has been crazy and I see no end in site.  I had no goals for October and it definitely felt like it.  I dropped the ball on meal planning and it was really hard to come up with meals on a daily basis.  I have sort of figured out a pattern for breakfasts and lunches and that has been a lifesaver.  It keeps the kids from asking me everyday what they are going to have, I simply point to the list and try to keep it the same.  Giving the kids a more substantial breakfast has really helped them during the day too.  It is definitely more work and I feel I am always doing dishes but well worth it. 
Soccer has kept us super busy.  It is so disruptive to my really productive time of day.  It seems we rush home from school, get a snack, get ready to go and then off and running, then come back and try to feed, bathe, homework the kids in a decent time to get them to bed.  1 1/2 weeks and counting. 
This next month my mom is having total knee replacement surgery and will be staying with us for at least a week but probably 2.  That will be a huge challenge for all of us.  We have no bedrooms downstairs so she will be living in our living room which is already crowded and chaotic and may not be the best place for recuperating from a major surgery but it was either I don't see my family for that period of time while I stay with her or we put up with some disruption for a short time. 
So for November, my goal is to prioritize.  To make lists and to pray over them.  I have a lot going on and things I keep adding to it or things that come up out of the blue and I really need to have some guidance on what I should be doing and what I should let go.  Saying no is not always my strong suit, I love helping people but sometimes my family needs to come first.  Something I am praying about. 
Hopefully it won't be another month before I blog but who knows...it might be the New Year before you see me again.  We will see.
One thing though I haven't done in awhile is ask for prayer requests.  I still love praying for my friends and feel it is so powerful in so many ways.  So if anyone has anything they want prayer for, please let me know.  I am happy to do it.
Well, if I don't see you again for awhile: Happy Thanksgiving, Merry Christmas and Happy New Years!

My couponing trip today

It has been awhile since I posted some of my couponing deals.  It is really hard to coupon in the summer with three kids in tow but now that they are back in school it is much easier.
However, I have been struggling with the conflict between getting good deals and feeding my kids healthier.  A lot of the really great deals are junk.  While I do buy some junk (I love ice cream and poptarts!) I try to limit it for my kids. 
So while I am trying to still find great deals, I am trying to incorporate healthy foods into them.  Right now Safeway has a buy 8 save .50 per item which with paired with coupons can make for some pretty good deals.  They have a lot of stuff throughout the store that they don't even have listed in their ads.  I am pretty sure I will be doing more of these deals over the next week.
Here is what I got today:

So if you ignore the ice cream cones and cheetos, I think I did pretty good.  The gum was buy one get one free and I had (2) $1/3 coupons that doubled making them $1.17 for 6 packs.  Trident is sugar free but doesn't have aspartame which I don't like, so I don't mind my kids chewing it.

The spinach and green leaf lettuces were $1 each and the jalapeno was .99c (I am making salsa this week!)  The cream cheese was buy one get one free so 2/$2.99.

The instant potatoes were free with a catalina (I know it's processed but my daughter will only eat instant garlic potatoes so sometimes I get them)

I think everything else was part of the buy 8 promo. These are the coupons I had:

 (2) $1/1 coupons for the artisan tortillas making them .49c each,

 .55c/1 dairy farmers making the cheese .74c with the doubler (so wish I had had another of those coupons!)

 the broth was 1.99 each (no coupon but it's good broth and it's organic!)

My total was $16.50 for all of that.  Not too bad considering I didn't have coupons for everything I bought.

Then I went to Rite Aid:

My total there after coupons was 7.61, I used $6 in UPs and received $10.38 back in UPs rewards.  They were running a spend $25 get a $5 UP for the past month and today was the last day to do it.  I had to spend just over $9 to get my total over $25 (I hit 25.83!)  The toothbrushes were on sale for 2.69 each and you got a 2.69 UP back plus I had a .75c off and a $1 off coupon so I really ended up making $1.75 on toothbrushes!  The mouthwash was on sale for $4 and I had a $1/1 coupon plus it put me over the 25 so I was good with that.

The tuna was buy one get one free and I had (2) $1/2 coupons so that made them .25c each!

Next week I will have over $12 in UPs to spend so I might not even have any out of pocket there.  I just love Rite Aid!!

There you go.  My big couponing for the week.  It's a good thing it was a good week b/c my grocery cash envelope only has $2 in it.  Yay for a new month starting saturday!  

Meals

I know I should just make my meal week tuesday through monday but I still have hopes of being organized enough on a sunday to write my plan out.
I will say though that having breakfast and lunches mostly planned out has been a huge relief for me.  It really does make my days easier.
I am going to write the past 2 days even though they are over, just in case anyone needs ideas.
Sunday:
B: pancakes, bacon, scrambled eggs
L: leftover tacos
D: BBQ, zucchine with rotini noodles, salad

Monday:
B: at sitters
L: quesadillas
D: leftover chicken/noodles

Tuesday:
B: scrambled eggs and toast
L: noodles
D: chicken fried steak, long grain/wild rice, green beans

Wednesday
B: scones
L: sandwiches
D: pizza at a birthday party

Thursday
B: pancakes
L: bagel/cream cheese
D: crockpot chicken, noodle roni (my MIL is picking the kids up, taking son to soccer and doing dinner, so am trying to make it easy on her-hence the noodle roni)

Friday
B: at sitters
L: kids are getting hot lunch
D: leftovers

Saturday
B: cereal, yogurt
L: not sure
D: BBQ (while we can), potatoes of some sort

I clearly need to work on some details and I am going to try making some breakfast cookies and see how that goes over.  Now that I have a little order to breakfast and lunches for the main dish, I need to work on the sides and figure out a routine for my dinners.  But I am slowly working on it and it is definitely going better than it has in the past.

Meal Plan

Once again I cannot seem to get my meal plan listed on Sunday.

It has been really nice to have meal plans for all my meals.  I have really been trying to make the kids a good breakfast and while it is taking some getting used to, I am very grateful when they aren't telling me they are hungry 30 minutes after eating.

Also, I usually try to have the kids eat fruit at most meals but I offer them choices, so I might not always list what specific fruit we have.  Fortunately they all like a wide variety of fruits.  Veggies not so much, you will see a lot of carrots and salad listed.

I am going to go ahead and back track to Sunday and what we ate:
Sunday:
     B: simple soaked pancakes from Heavenly Homemakers (it's an adjustment eating whole wheat pancakes but a few chocolate chips sprinkled in really helped!)
     L: hot dogs, baked french fries, carrots, fruit
     D: beef vegetable soup/chicken noodle for the kids, fruit
Monday
     B: at sitter's
     L: quesadillas, carrots,
     D: leftover pizza, salad, fruit
Tuesday
     B: scrambled eggs, toast   
     L: noodles, carrots, applesauce
     D:spaghetti and meatballs, green beans, salad, watermelon/blueberries


Wednesday
     B: pancakes
     L: ham or turkey sandwiches, carrots, cantaloupe
     D: leftover beef soup
Thursday
     B: cereal, whole wheat banana bread
     L: ham/turkey sandwiches, carrots, fruit
     D: chicken/broccoli over brown rice
Friday
     B: at sitters
     L: sandwiches, carrots, fruit
     D: leftover spaghetti and meatballs
Saturday
     B: kids choice
     L: having a garage sale and the boys will be at a Ducks game so not sure
     D: BBQ hamburgers/hot dogs, baked beans, roasted potatoes

I am clearly in a rut with lunches for the kids, they are going to get so bored with sandwiches, this is something I really need to work on in the next few weeks!

Strong Tower

Towers.  Twin Towers.  North Tower.  South Tower.  Funny how before 9/11 happened, I didn't think about those words at all.  I had been to New York City.  I had not been in the Towers but in one of the other World Trade Center buildings where my brother worked and looked out the window at the Towers.  To be honest, other than being really tall, they didn't leave an impression on me.

But then 2 planes were flown into them and it changed my perception forever.  The phrase "Twin Towers" now means so much more to those of us who witnessed it.  I will never forget the feeling of wondering if my brother was at work that day.  Such a scary thought that for me only lasted a minute before I remembered he was on vacation.  I was lucky my story had that happy ending.  So many people lost loved ones that day, and so many since....

I am grateful that the 10 year anniversary landed on a Sunday.  And I am lucky that my pastor has such a gift for turning our hearts to God.  His sermon today refreshed my soul and reminded me that this earth is passing.  That we truly never know what is going to happen in any given day.  It might not be as big as a plane landing into a building but it could be a heart attach, a diagnosis of cancer, a car accident....all of those things change your life forever but the one constant in this life is God.

Psalm 61 which has been turned into one of my favorite songs says "for you have been a shelter for me, a strong tower from the enemy" (vs. 3)  What I didn't know is that David wrote this song after his son died.  And even though I have heard the song from this reference over and over again, the significance of God being referred to as the strong tower never really struck me.  But when I stop and think about the word tower, I think of Eiffel Tower, Tower of Babel, Twin Towers.... all things that are big and things that people probably thought would stand the test of time.  While things on this earth can be destroyed, our towers that we build as humans are not eternal. 

"The name of the Lord is a strong tower; The righteous run to it and are safe"  Proverbs 18:10. 

It's amazing how you can read a passage in the Bible over and over and not get it.  A simple passage.    One that fits so perfectly, so completely in our present day situation.  What an amazing God we have that words written so long ago, are so appropos today. 

I am not sure I will think about the word tower in the same sense ever again.  When I think of 9/11 and what it did to our country, and I think of those towers falling to the ground, I will forever remember Proverbs 18:10 and Psalm 61.  He is our tower of strength, something we never need fear, our God who will always stand strong and true and magnificent.